Jessica Martin | Author

Or: Why my caffeine tolerance is now spiritually concerning.

This month, I discovered something important about myself: I am not—absolutely not—a chill writer. Not even on my best day. I joined Novel November with the goal of writing 50,000 words, and instead of writing 50,000 words, I’ve actually written 85,243.

Yes, really.

No, I don’t know how I’m still alive.

So today I’m sharing the chaos, the wins, the mistakes, the caffeine overdoses, and everything I learned about writing a romance novel at breakneck speed.

Grab a coffee (or three). You’ll feel better about your own habits afterward.

The Zero Chill Origin Story

I started this month with a plan. A very respectable plan.
Write in the morning, stop by dinner, get some sleep, behave like a functioning adult.

Obviously, that didn’t last.

By Day Two, I was writing at 1am, drinking coffee I shouldn’t be drinking, and bargaining with myself like, “If I write one more scene, I can sleep. Eventually.” My productivity turned feral very quickly — but surprisingly, it worked. Not because chaos is sustainable (it absolutely isn’t), but because it forced me to stop overthinking and actually write.

Writing Fast vs. Writing Well (Spoiler: I Accidentally Did Both)

Here’s what shocked me: the faster I wrote, the better my writing became.

When you’re aiming for 50,000 words — and you’ve already blown past that with XX,XXX — you stop worrying about polishing every sentence. My inner critic simply didn’t have time to chime in. And the moment she shut up, everything loosened up:

• My characters felt like real people instead of curated caricatures.
• The pacing tightened naturally.
• The banter sharpened because I wasn’t editing it to death.
• The emotional beats landed harder because I didn’t smother them with perfectionism.

The lesson was painfully clear: I write better when I stop trying to impress anyone.

Is it perfect? Fuck, no. I’ll have to edit it into oblivion. But it’s way better than I imagined it would be.

The Perfect Outline Lie (Sort Of)

I’m a plotter. Always have been. I outline like someone preparing a legal deposition. I love structure. I love flowcharts. I love knowing exactly where I’m headed.

And then the story said, “That’s adorable,” and did whatever it wanted.

Characters misbehaved. Scenes rearranged themselves. Emotional arcs shifted. Some moments bullied their way into existence long before their scheduled slot.

I realized that plotting is amazing — but only if you allow yourself room to improvise. The outline is a guide, not a prison sentence.

The Coffee Situation (Send Help)

I used to think I “liked” coffee.
Now coffee is my defining trait.

This month, I hit levels of consumption that are probably illegal in several countries. The day I accidentally wrote over 8,000 words in a single sitting? Sponsored entirely by bad decisions and caffeine.

It’s not healthy. It’s not advisable. But it did propel me to that gloriously unhinged 85,243 word count, so I can’t say I regret it.

I am trying to pace myself now, and I reduced my coffee intake from 5 cups a day to 2.

Productivity Hacks That Actually Saved Me

Surprisingly, some methods genuinely kept me from falling apart:

1. Writing Sprints

Short bursts of 25-30 minutes. No distractions. They work like witchcraft.

2. Scene Breadcrumbs

Leaving a quick note at the end of every session:
“Next: They fight over the cat.”
“Next: She admits she lied.”
“Next: He finally says the thing.”

Game-changing. Starting cold kills momentum. Starting warm keeps you flying.

3. Location Hopping

My desk betrayed me. The couch? Productive.
My bed? Weirdly powerful. (No judgment.)
Best place? A Starbucks no one goes to (it was AMAZING.)

4. No Rereading

If I reread, I spiral. I edit. I hate everything.
This month was a strict anti-rereading zone — and it saved the draft.

The Emotional Rollercoaster

Novel November is basically the five stages of grief, plus a few extras:

• Denial
• Motivation
• Chaos
• Overconfidence
• Despair
• Sudden brilliance
• More despair
• Acceptance
• Unhinged productivity

There were days when I stared at my laptop like it owed me money. Other days, entire scenes exploded out of me like they’d been waiting for permission. The more tired I got, the more honest my characters became.

Sleep deprivation shouldn’t be a writing strategy, but wow did it make the banter good.

What This Month Actually Taught Me

Beyond the caffeine shakes and existential crises, here’s the real takeaway:

• I write faster when I’m not trying to be perfect.
• I’m capable of way more than I think.
• Momentum matters more than motivation.
• Inspiration is optional. Showing up is not.
• The messy draft is still progress — sometimes it’s even the good stuff.

My inner perfectionist died around November 10th. It was peaceful. She needed to go.

So… My Final Word Count

Instead of writing 50,000 words, I’ve actually written XX,XXX.
Yes. Already. And the month isn’t even over.

No chill. Zero moderation. But honestly? I’m proud of myself.

If you’re doing Novel November too, tell me your current word count in the comments. If you’re not, tell me what you’re working on — writing, revising, building a habit, or simply surviving adulthood. We’re all doing the best we can.

Here’s to the chaos. And to the draft.